Sunday, April 01, 2012

Trust the Process

March was a crazy month. I don't think I was the only one who felt it. It was laden with pain, confusion, loneliness and grief. Seasoned with outbursts similar to the solar flares, March supported the "wrong" thing to be said by myself and others, and even though amends were made, apologies were left unaccepted.  For many (me included) there has been dismantling of old ways of being.

I know it wasn't just me, for every time I unloaded my emotional burden on a friend or family member, they had their own stories of the wrong thing being said, a feeling of loss and confusion, a dismantling of the old foundation.  My last three blogs are a clear path through the pains of March. They are only window views, as I'm sure your own pains are deeper than you might let on.

When I asked for guidance, I received simple messages, like "they don't need you as a friend, ... just hold space for them to break away".

When my cat died, I did everything the way I wanted to. I allowed him a dignified transition and stayed with him through the end. I sobbed over him as I buried him in his favorite garden, allowing myself to cry as unabashedly as I needed to, allowing my love to melt into the grief of losing such a dear friend. I know this is how it is supposed to be. We let our emotions come up and out, engaging the spiritual lesson, no matter how uncomfortable or messy it might be.

For those of us who have been struggling, I relate the information that has been shared with me;  trust the process. Out of the dismantled confusion will be borne something new, something stronger and more sturdy. Out of the nightmare, let us awaken, renewed and willing to bear the pain and struggle for as long as we live, for these are the counterpoints to love and peace. They are the sour and salty to the sweet of our lives and it is worth it, always, to feel deeply, even the difficult emotions. After all, isn't that what really makes us human?

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