PLAY

What if you only get one chance at this life? One chance to live it fully, voraciously and savor it with glee? What if you have been taking it all too seriously and need to get down to some good old unstructured play time. It feels like the time is now for me. Play is becoming a priority. Starting October 1st, I have committed to playing every day. Luckily, I have some friends and family members who are masters who will willingly guide me into playtime.

Monday I was introduced to the only nude beach in Santa Barbara.

I am 44 and a mother and a wife and... fully human. This is not me though. This is a Master of Play. Jill.

This was only about half way up the cliff. It made my head spin to look down from the top.

We looked for Great White Sharks from our perch but sadly, saw none.

This is me. Nicely filtered. Tastefully covered by the cool waves

On Tuesday I took a fossil walk on the beach.

I truly love the different geological stories told at each and every beach in Santa Barbara

I find vertebrate fossils every time. I know what rocks to look at to find them.

I thought, "maybe I should publish a book on Vertebrate Fossils on the Beaches of Santa Barbara".  I would probably be the only geek to buy it. 

I had fun with the waves and the rocks.

On Wednesday, I went for a paddle with Jill and Aleya.  I couldn't find my board racks for my car and so I came to the beach just with a wetsuit. I swam out a little bit and joined Jill on her board. We paddled tandem. It was so fun!!

I also created these:

It's been a good week for play. 

Learning How

Learning how to relax. Learning how to ask. Learning how to delegate. Learning how to be the me I am today. It's a never ending process, one that seems effortless at times and sometimes such a struggle. I crossed the boundary into magical 44 and already, life seems different.

Did a dip on my birthday

Saw this owl yesterday (she may have been stunned or injured- Jill and I gave her reiki)

Last night, The shoreline in my dream revealed whales, dolphins and separately ... a white shark.

We Are But Feathers

Have you been feeling as out-of-control as I have? Rest assured, we are all but feathers on the breath of God. If we just go where we are blown, without the struggle, the breeze begins to calm and sooth rather than stress us.  As long as we are still breathing, we are OK.

 We are OK.

It Can Always Get Worse

It has been one hell of a week. Maybe two. Cadence was supposed to leave for Prague last Thursday but ended up at Cottage Hospital with a kidney infection instead. Today is Monday, and she is still there. Her kidney infection developed into pneumonia and she has now gone five days without food. Nothing sounds appealing. She is nauseous. She has thrown up. Life takes a turn we never anticipated, never dreamed could happen to us and now what? Her flight to Prague got rescheduled twice, maybe three times by now, with no anticipation of a quick departure at this point. Now all we want is some progress towards regaining health. All we want is a consistently normal temperature, and an apatite. We want an apatite and actual food consumption.

While all this is happening to Cadence, the world continues to turn and others in the family fall into their own small crises. Someone has panic attacks about gym class, someone is stressed about their future, someone's car has broken down for the third time in five days, someone's room is infested with fleas, someone just wont eat, and someone (me) is just trying to keep her chin up and keep moving forward.

It can always get worse, so I realize this week that instead of being weighed down by all the shit that keeps on happening, we should all just dodge and weave, picking ourselves up and taking a sip of soup to regain our strength. We can't give up on life when it starts showering us with challenges. We have to keep a neutral stance, taking each calamity as it comes and doing our best to get through it all, expecting that we will not anticipating that we won't.

What Makes a Family

I married into, birthed and inherited my children. I have five. The first two daughters, I married, the third daughter and son, I birthed and the fifth child, I inherited. My husband's ex-wife gave birth to a third daughter, Faith, a year after she and Tom divorced. Having come from divorce, I knew how awful it felt to be left out from a "new family" so Tom and I decided to include Faith on a few of our family trips. When she was 8, she joined us in Tahiti. Then there was Hilton Head, South Caroloina. She came with us to Disney World and New York City and it was an absolute must that she participate in our Fiji return this summer.  Faith has become a full-fledged member of the family with her own (albeit rotating) room.  A family creates memories together. They include each other, they annoy each other, they grow up together and they remain united, if they choose. If we have done our job well, our children will remain close to each other and close to us because they like to be with us, as much as we like to be with them.  Our Fiji trip was a glue. I believe it was a pliable, yet permanently sticky glue that will meld us together for good, as a family. Peer in and take a look:

I realize that I am an important part of our family. As a natural nurturer, it has been "easy" for me to be compassionate about all of the members.

My beautiful family!

None of this would be possible without Tom. I am so grateful!