Something New

My first leather cuff! Stacy and I went to Tandy Leather in Ventura on Tuesday. I bought a bag of leather scraps, a leather needle and some waxed thread. Yesterday, I met and was inspired by a sweet woman who makes her own silver charms to place on beautiful leather cuffs. I wanted one, but knew I shouldn't spend the $75 just now, so I came home and made my own! I love the ingenuity I have and am unafraid to use. Ahhhhh, a new inspiration. Would you like one too? Just say the word!

For Jill.

Feeling Better

You know you are feeling better when a veggie corn dog seems like a good post dinner snack, and because you can find no mustard you create a "sauce" out of mayonaise and el pato ( a mexican tomato sauce made with spicy jalepeno). It is so tasty, you make some more (sauce, that is) because your calorie cop, I mean, husband, is not at home and you eat it with chips. Yep, you, I mean I, must be feeling better.

How I Do It All

How do I do it all? Create beautiful gemstone jewelry, handcraft essential oil and gemstone candles with beautiful labels and matchboxes, paint pins for kids, work 4.5 hours a week as lunch lady and volunteer another two hours in first and fourth grade classrooms, shop, cook, pay bills, maintain my fit figure and beautifully colored hair, maintain my tidy house?  I don't. I can't do it all. I have to pick and choose every day. My house is frequently a pit. My roots are long and grey. My garage is overflowing with crap. I choose art and artistic endeavors because they make me happy. I think it is important for my sanity to do things that make me happy. I also don't think kids grow up remembering how neat their house was (in a good way). You never hear someone's life being celebrated by the cleanliness of their house.  So I steal my precious moments doing things I love, like making films of Kieran and her friends, reading with Aidan, napping, meditating, creating, listening to my inner voices that flood me with ideas while I am showering or trying to sleep.

I guess I have been doing too much though, for today I am sick. sick. sick.

Ta Daaaa

Well......



Here she is!!

JUST KIDDING! That's me. Just wanted to make sure you were ready.













Now, don't look any further if you are squeamish. I'm warning you!






Consider yourself warned.





I'll go backwards, showing the most recent pics that I have moving back to Tuesday morning, the day after surgery.

WOW! Look at that pretty chin!

Are we ready?

Because Mom is permitting me to create a documentary film about her uplifting experience with cosmetic surgery, she has created a more neutral observer out of me. Brilliant maneuver on her part. Now, the question is, whom of my readers is ready for the graphic nature of the footage? I will simply say that the procedure went well and that the "after" shots are not too bad. One can see sculpted features and a wrinkle-free, albeit, swollen complexion. I liken Mom's image to a cross between the invisible man and cleopatra. Please comment if you would like to see.  If I get enough curiosity, I have permission to publish preview shots.

Uplifted

Mom had her surgery today. As it turns out, this was her first time ever under general anesthesia. Pretty amazing for  63 year old. The procedure went "well".  She was in surgery for over 2 hours and in a pre-op consultation, her cosmetic surgeon talked her into a chin implant. Maybe the problem wasn't so much that her neck was sagging but that there just wasn't enough chin to hold it up. I can't imagine why the doctor waited until this particular moment to make this suggestion. Mom, as many of us know, is NOT quick to process. I can just imagine it; Mom, nervous, hungry, a little apprehensive in her surgical gown and shower cap with an authority figure making a suggestion to "add a little chin". I know her, she said "yes" whether or not she really thought it was a good idea.  I am a little bit upset about it all, but, Oh well. We can laugh about it, I guess.

I took some pre-surgery footage and pictures so we could really appreciate the whole process.  I touched up a couple of the before shots so we can get ready for the smoother, tighter look to come. I don't know how to airbrush in some extra chin though, so we will just have to wait for the real thing tomorrow to get a good look.

Mom's Neck Movie

My Mom is allowing me to chronicle her surgical improvements. How could I refuse? I love telling a story through film. I have started with a few stills and short clips from a beautiful hike we took this morning. It was absolutely stunning out there. Last year, during the first week in May, the very trail we were on burned in the huge flames of the Jesusita fire. The fire took out all the brush that had been holding the soil in place. This year's rain had brought much rubble and rock down the creek ravines and allowed me access to fossils that are 60 million years old. Heaven! Hiking is like a shopping trip to Tiffany, without the blue box!

My Boy

 

Aidan turned seven on Monday. He was my angel friend when I was pregnant. I dreamed of a boy with brown eyes and blonde hair (written in my pregnancy journal- just to prove it). Without ultrasound or amniocentesis proof, I was sure he was a boy.  I was sure of his sweetness. I was sure of his calm wisdom. What I was not sure of, and have seen time and time again over the last seven years is his stubborn, willful, unwavering capacity to stand firm in a decision to NOT do something. Like a big horse, thirsty as ever, led to a crystal clear brook but refusing to drink the life-giving water. For example, yesterday, our sweet son was scheduled to have his second one on one karate lesson, the first of which he loved, practicing all week his blocks and horse stance beautifully. He had talked about it, the time and date of his lessons. An hour before lesson time he was asleep on the couch presumably in a post cake-snack coma exacerbated by the fact that he had broken his brand new N scale model locomotive (not mortally, though- just a flesh wound).  We woke him up and he insisted that he did not want to go. When asked why, his reply; "I don't really know". I asked Tom to do his Dad thing, somehow getting Aidan to do the thing we wanted him to do without his consent. I have had many a moment of pleading bribery, threats, hissing, screaming, and crying that got us nowhere. Maybe Tom would do better.

The outcome?   Bribery with a cookie, a visit next weekend to the B-17 Bomber coming to town, threats, hissing, crying and guess what.. NO KARATE LESSON. He refused.  That's my boy. My sweet sweet stubborn seven year old boy.

What's My Deal?

My mom is scheduled to have a neck lift, eyelid lift and under eye fat removal on Monday. I am, and always have been, vehemently against this kind of elective surgery. Now, understand that I am a beautiful woman. I am not being vain, I was born with full lips, a symmetrical face, really nice teeth (from braces and diligent upkeep), a tall, strong curvy figure and an ass the size of a pick up truck. My sisters are beautiful, my children are beautiful, my nieces and nephews, brothers in law, husband and step dad and friends are beautiful. My mother is a striking, radiant beauty and always has been. So here I am surrounded by beauty, why am I so against the amplification of it?  Here is my theory.

Since I was seven, the age of soul recognition, I have felt a certain conviction about kindness, love, beauty, treatment of others, and what was right. I knew/know that the body is a vessel, a vehicle to experience the lifetime we are presently in. It is not the end-all be-all. The body is not the IT. It is more the HOW. So the body can flex and shrink, move or be still, it can be flawed  or "perfect" but it isn't the soul. It is the house, apartment really, for the soul to exist, feel and learn, interacting and experiencing as much as it can in the time allotted.

How many children have to be born with cleft lips or flippers for hands and how many times do The Elephant Man, Mask, and The Hunchback of Notre Dame need to be made and re-made before we remember the lesson of where true beauty resides?  Just because we live in a culture where physical beauty is valued as much as it is doesn't mean we are evolving in a direction that moves us forward in our soul lessons. Are you happy with the state of focus that the media places our society in?  In my opinion, we as a society and culture have it all back asswards.

Trusted friends, beloved sisters, nieces, nephews, brothers and sisters in law, children, husband and parents, if ever I become deformed, obese, hideously ugly, smelly, broken, saggy, wrinkled, blotchy, bald, hairy, wear a diaper, or encounter any other physical situation that leaves my body less than desirable to look at, please close your eyes, plug your nose and feel my radiant soul energy wash over your being like a wave of golden loving light, because that is where my true beauty resides.

No matter what you do to yourself Mom, I will always look at you as the golden violet orb of shimmering light that you are, with the really tight neck and alert eyes.

Physical Energy

The physical follows the energetic. Your thoughts become your reality. What you focus on, you create. Your fears become your experience. You dream your future. Manifest with intention. Meditation teaches you how to visualize physical health and connect to energetic support in the form of spirit guides, guardian angels and your own higher self. Your chakra system needs your attention, quiet yourself and visualize the rainbow starting from your red root, orange sacral, yellow solar plexus, green heart, blue throat, indigo third eye and violet crown. Feel the energy flowing and surround yourself in golden, healing light. Create the energy to shift the physical.

Collaboration

This is a collaboration between Kieran and myself to honor the bright and helpful kids at Hope School. Kieran draws on the wood pieces and I paint them in. I glue the pin backs on to the little pieces of wood. The kids themselves requested things like a skateboarding elephant, a Domo in a sombrero with maracas, a pug, a dolphin and a pony together, a penguin on an iceberg holing a flag with my name on it, a purple dog kicking a pink soccer ball and much much more. The only shortage we have is time. Lots of love all the way around.

Candle Evolution

I started with beading. Learning the basics from my sisters. I moved into beading jewelry with gemstones. I found that I preferred working with natural earthly substances. My jewelry became more about the stones and their therapeutic properties than about the jewelry itself. After falling in love with Aveda body oils and generating an expensive habit, I decided to blend my own and infuse the oils with gemstones. My first blend was simple. I called it "Aura Oil" and it had lavender and Tibetian crystal quartz. I loved the energetic component and my skin has never felt softer. I also enjoy creating beautiful labels for the oils.

 The next progression was therapeutic candles, made with essential oils and gemstones, just like my body oils.  I made them with soy wax which is cleaner and longer burning than paraffin and has a delightfully creamy texture. I use simple mason jars and have included a special box of matches with every candle. The match boxes and mason jar lids have been my canvases for creative expression. I paint them and include a picture and inspiring words.  My friend Jill has allowed me to use her original paintings as graphics for my labels. It makes for a beautiful finished candle.

I will be adding these to my website, www.shelleysbellys.com very soon. They will be $24.

The second picture shows a grouping of stones that went into a very special candle. From top going clockwise, carved carnelian elephant, crystal quartz, black tourmaline, kyanite, ruby,
aquamarine and apatite. Yum!

What is a Crush Anyway?

It happens to me a lot. I see the spark in someone. It could only be for a moment, even in passing, some sort of recognition. I have learned how to enjoy it without it becoming a problematic issue. It's like seeing someone's true self, unveiled, quickly, just a peek, and if you are paying attention, you might witness something amazing. It happens a lot. I see a lot of these sparks of truth. I see through all sorts of layers. I see it in all realms of age and gender, although the "crush" feeling only hits me with a certain type of person. I know how to maintain a safe distance, to reel in my own true self, my own sparkle, when I know that I have been witnessed too. It's so fun!

Green Week

It was a green week. I had a cold, staying home with two kids Monday, and one kid Tuesday and Wednesday. I made pins for St. Patrick's day for the kids at school who weren't wearing green. Mercy pins to keep them from being pinched. I made way too much shepard's pie. Practiced being OK with just being.

Kieran's Painting

Kieran is funny. Kieran is a natural. Kieran has gifts. Kieran is insecure when I compliment Aidan on anything. Lucky for me, I have dealt with the likes of Kieran before, in her older sister, Cadence. I thought it was because I was her stepmom. I thought the divorce did it to her, her ego and insecurity all rolled into one. Now I see, in Kieran, another fiery talent, that it is the dragon in both of them. Kieran has lead a charmed life, with loving attentive parents who feed her creativity and expose her to the world, culture, art and music. She displays so many of the same character traits that her sister has, I see now that I have been "warmed up" here for Kieran.

Here are some Kieran pics, if you don't peruse her blog regularly.

Mrs. Meaney's Beauty Tip

"Mrs. Meaney, will you make me a pin with my name on it?"

"If you pick up that trash, yes."

"Mrs. Meaney, will you make me a pin that says save the wave?"

"Go sort compostables, recycleables, trash and liquids and it's a yes."





Mrs. Meaney, if I help today, will you make me a pin with Darth Maul and my name on it?"

"Yes Tyler, I will."











Here's a beauty tip I discovered yesterday.
If you have a Mac, go on to photo booth and choose effects. Select "mirror image" and align your face perfectly. Look how perfectly perfect I look! No asymmetry. No crooked smile. Now weird squinty eye.

This is the real me. Not bad.

Or you can do this:

Why Say Yes

I love to say yes. I know this about myself. I love to have adventures, I love to make things for people, I love to give it away, I love the risk and daring promise of the "yes". I wish I could say yes more. I was invited by one of my friends to accompany her on a bonzai trip to Australia. She invited me on Friday for a trip that commenced Sunday night at ten. Now, if I didn't have kids, a husband, commitments, and had made a promise to conserve our finances, I would have jumped on that plane so fast, I wouldn't have even blinked. Yes!

It got me thinking about the fun I have been able to experience. Since I have been married and had kids, I have traveled with girlfriends to Portland, the Sierras and Alaska. I have gone to NYC with my mom and sisters twice. I have had many an evening of sweat-lodge or full moon magic.

 I said yes to my first trip abroad when I was sixteen, not knowing how I would ever finance it but determined, I found a way. At eighteen, I traveled spontaneously to Sweden for a summer based a request made via long distance phone call. After college, I went to Ecuador for two months in a blissful state of misery because a professor whom I admired suggested that I go. I love to say yes!

Here is my list of things I want badly to say yes to. The yesses are very much about me as an individual. These are not familial yesses. Those are a given. Where my family goes, I go. My personal yes list is as follows:

A spiritual walking journey through the powerful grid lines of Spain (The Camino de Whatever- I don't know the name, only that I want to go) with my coven of whales, Jill and Krista. We have planned for this to happen in ten years. Lucky for us, I am patient.

A trip to India or Bhutan and Thailand with a friend who can show me the real way.

South America, to Incan ruins, Central America to Mayan sites of power, to experience the full energetic marvels that await me there.

What ever comes up that excites and intrigues me. I love the adventure of being surprised!

I also love to say yes to the kids at school who ask me to make them things. There is so much power in the "yes" response. I really love it.

So my friend went to Australia on a huge adventure. I am so proud of her for saying yes. It is a secret that people are beginning to discover that yes is a hell of a lot more fun than no.

My Friend

I have a friend, David, whom I've never actually met. My sister, Stephanie met him in an airport gift shop. He was one of "those people" whom you just know, even though you don't know. I knew, the first time I read a chapter of the book he was presenting to a publisher in Santa Barbara that he was someone important to me. I knew he was exceptional and I was in a position to be friend to an angel incarnate. No pressure, David, angels in human bodies are supposed to fuck up and be real. I e-mailed him as "Stephanie's sister" and we have become friends, talking now and again, e-mailing and texting. David has been sending me chapters of his book, for me to read and feel, while he is editing. Each chapter he has sent has lead me to a different emotion, a different experience and a different theme to ponder. I am reading one of the most important books of my life and it hasn't even been published yet. I can't believe how lucky I am to have this new/old friend who trusts me enough to share this precious work. It is beautiful, thought provoking, eloquently written and timely. My friend's book is called Traveling at the Speed of Life. You are going to want to read it too. It is that good.

www.Contibute2.org is David's official site if you would like to check it out.